I Can't Lose Him

Why did I do that to myself? Lie to myself to make us happy, to keep him from hurting?

It was never the truth before. I never took it seriously.

Now that it all flows out, the embarrassments, the secrets, the lies. I was never proud.
I tried keeping them cuz I didn’t know. I was clueless.

I was stupid to not know what I had. But coming so close to losing him killed me.

Knowing he didn’t care made me feel like dying.

The feeling scarred into my heart. Making me realize I wanted him more than anything.

I needed him with me. I loved him more than anything else.

I was never ready to lose him and I never will be. I regret every stupid choice I made.

For all it did was take his trust from me and hurt us both.

Never again will I do that to him. This I promise, to keep from losing my love Dillan