Effection(Affection)

i want to let you know that you are in my mind every second of each day.
i listen to every word you say.
i hate the way you cry, and you never tell me why.
i hate the way you laugh, and i cant join in.
i hate the way you love, and i'm not the one you're in love with.
i hate how you get mad, because apparently everything i do without you is bad.
i hate the way you think, it's all just way too quick..

the way you broke my heart because i broke yours.
all you did was think i didnt love you. when that's the only thing i do.
my existence is for you. and yours is for mine too.

you just ignore my tears and pain.
but i all i do is make you insane.

i make you mad, i make you depressed, i make you laugh, i make you cry..
but now there's nothing left.
nothing we could have kept.
i ruined it all. everything is a mess.

the pieces fell apart.
you know it's all my fault.
regret and guilt fills my mind, but i just can't see why i waste this time.
i want you here. but i fear i won't have you ever again.
you can slip out of my hands at any point of time.
i was yours, you were mine.
i will never have you, i will have nothing.
you can have anything you want in the world..you actually mean something.