If only i could hate

I want to hate you
Despise you,
Loathe you.
But I am unable.

You left a mark on me,
And it won't go away.
You were part of the reason,
Why I am the way I am.
You've caused me so much pain.
You've made me cry so many tears.
You helped me fly,
Then made me crash.

The laughter you created has stopped,
The tears you made stopped flowing,
My eyes go cold when I see your face,
My ears scream out when I hear your voice.
You caused some of my insanity

Now…if only I could hate you.