Most of the time

I want to blame it on something.

I want to have a reason.

I cry and I cry and feel so sad, but I don't know why.

Why do I feel this way? So tired and mad?

I have nothing to be angry at.

I'm wanted and loved by my family, sure we have our differences, but that's no reason to be mad.

I want there to be a reason, it can't just be me, can it?

Can I really be that bad of a person, to hate what I have?

But I don't hate it. I love them and everything that I have.

So why do I snap at them, say mean things, and push them away?

Why do I cry, out of nowhere, for no reason.

There has to be a reason, there has to be a problem.

So why can't they find it? So why can't they fix it? Why can't they fix me?

I don't want to become sad out of the blue no more. I don't want to snap at people for doing nothing wrong no more.

I want to be okay, all of the time. Because most of the time just isn't good enough.