Strong

I am lost and confused
I do not know where to go,
i am lost and alone
helpless and abused.

Life is going by,
and i'm just following behind.
Sickness has taken over,
i dare not even try.

Try to take a breath,
or sit for just a while.
But i'm pulled back from my dreaming.
I am no longer a child.

I can not cry,
i simply must be strong.
No matter how much pain,
i must do nothing wrong.

I think about disappearing,
of leaving this world.
But i think about my mother,
and my father.
and my sister,
and my friends,
and my love.
Will they miss me?
Will they long for me?
Will they cry for me?

Am i loved?
Or is it just pretend.
I can not help to wonder,
if this could be the end.