Jesus' Bad Day

It was a hot day
The sun was sweltering
Jesus awoke in mid-day
He knew it was gonna be bad
He awoke on the wrong side of the cot
First thing he did was cuss at his dad
He didn't wanna do miracles
Just wasn't in the mood
Just leave that to the oracles
Jesus left to Galilee
The sand was extra hot
It burned and stung like a bee
Sand filled his toes
Divine anger filled his heart
It's a story everyone knows
Jesus was having a hellish morning
He decided to walk on water
that always kept him from mourning
however it had been dry
The water was shallow. Rocks everywhere
His big toe got stubbed
He swore his father, again
Maybe he'd go to temple
Perhaps he'd tell mother
She knows all about dealing with this crap
The temple was full of merchants!
Ooh! he was pissed! He just wanted to nap!
Here were heathens and sodomites!
Selling trinkets in his house!
Who cares about their rights?
I am the Son of GOD
cried Jesus in a rage
(with a smoking hot bod)
I guess pride runs in the family?
He took Judas' whip (he liked that kinda thing)
and became a veritable Indy
He whipped and whipped the scum
The ran like sissies
holding bulging red bums
I guess Jesus just had a bad day.