You'll Never Understand.

You’ll never understand. You’ll never understand what it feels like to want to eat something so fucking bad, but know that if you do, you’ll fucking hate yourself.

You’ll never understand how absolutely hard it is to just decide whether to eat something or not.

You’ll never understand what it’s like to have the image of a bowl of fucking oatmeal or toast with fucking jam lingering in your head, taunting you, eating away at your mind, knowing that if you eat it, you’ll be miserable- but if you don’t, the prolonging thoughts will destroy you.

You’ll never understand what it’s like to eat so chaotically that it’s either 3 pieces of cereal or 3 fucking bowls of it.

You’ll never understand how it feels to switch from wanting to eat something so bad, to being too scared every half a second until you either have to cut yourself or cry or scream or anything to halt the nonsense.

You’ll never understand how fucking hard it is.