Life Sentence

I have this Disorder
And all I need is your support
I hear your words , You say something is wrong with me
I think I've grasped this point already
But its like an addiction
It hard to over come
I'm Self conscious about what I look like
And I felt this was my only cure

It started when I was in school
I figured people would like me if I got skinnier
But after I started , It got harder and harder to stop
I do regret everyday I put myself through it
But I know you don't believe me
Thoughts overwhelm my brain about how I'm not skinny enough
Why cant you believe this?

I'm now sitting in a hospital bed
Getting forced to eat
They say it will all get better
I truly want to believe this, I do
But every time I eat I start to feel guilty
I want to cry
I never asked for this, Its not fair
But it controls me entire life
Its a compulsion

People still continue to make assumptions
They don't care to come ask me
They make comments about how I'm ruining my life
Don't you think I already know?
But like I said Its like an addiction
It gives me my high I crave
And gives my brain comfort
But every night I go to bed and Realize This disorder
Is My Life Sentence.