Without You (Shattered Dreams)

Without you
is suddenly so real,
and panic is so
impossibly in control.

Chaos fills my mind,
torn between dreams
and a schism in our futures
so terrifying I can’t breathe.

You smile too much
when we both know what
could be happening,
what is happening,

and I know you’re just strong,
Stronger than me when
I’m crumpling to my knees, pleading
help from a god I don’t believe in.

I want to feel happy,
knowing what I can have,
but my mind is reeling with
what I will lose:

the best thing
that has ever happened to me,
or the best thing
that could happen to me.

Without you
is suddenly so real,
and fulfilling every dream
is suddenly so unreal.