My reality or yours.......

Why do I keep asking what is my reality?
Why do I feel that my life so far is nothing but fiction and a dream?
I feel lost, hollow and alone but no one is listening
I want to feel more, but can’t
I want to cry to yell out, but why am I silent?
I don’t know who I am because....
I don’t know if I am, but I want to feel and release this pain
To be real and let go of this pain
To be real for once in this reality that has been created for me
I want to belong be somewhere I’m someone to belong,
But cant until I’m gone and have disappeared*
From this reality that isn’t mine,
But was created for me
Disappear into my reality, my fantasy, my life
Until I can feel, and have erased this pain
Eventually isn’t for ever...is it?