Mummy...

Mum,
You tell me you’re proud of me
And it makes my heart soar
Would you be so proud if you knew?

I’m fat,
I swing from bingeing to anorexia
Sometimes in the space of a day
I’m losing weight now... but how long for?

I’m jobless,
I lie to you about this every time I see you
I fabricate a work life so you never have to know
I got sacked again

I’m unhappy,
I smile every time I see you
So you never see through me
I just want to cry on your shoulder

I’m considering selling my body,
Just think... your daughter... the slag
Makes you proud right?
Didn’t think so.

I’m a fighter,
You knew that from the start
But I’m fighting everyone’s help now
I’m ruining my life

I don’t want to lie anymore mum
I want to break down and tell you I failed
But I want you to be proud of me
Your daughter, the liar, the slag and the failure.