Dreaming

The pain is still here,
Nagging at me whenever my guard is down,
I can’t help it when I’m weak,
Everything becomes black,

I hate that I can’t breathe the same air as you,
I know I won’t for a while,
I remember seeing your chest rise and fall,
Now, when I look to your side of the bed,
Nothing is smiling back,

You haunt my dreams,
Changing them into nightmares,
I wasn’t in the mood to say goodbye,
I was pissed that you were going to have fun,
When I stayed home,

I can’t smile anymore,
It’s been a year,
I can still feel you,
You gave me your heart,
And I just threw it away for him,

We don’t even see each other anymore,
He isn’t worth hurting you,
But now you’re 6 feet in the ground,
Not being able to hear me when I say I’m sorry,

If it wasn’t for me,
You’d still be here,
Arms wrapped around my waist,
Kissing me,

I’ll just keep dreaming.