Fighting With My Self.

They say if i do it again,
I'll get put way.
They say that I'm addicted,
I need to stop.
I am addicted,
And i miss it.
Oh how i miss it.
The chill of the cold blade.
The crimson red, poring from my arm\,
Detracting me from my problems.
The chill,
The power,
The excitement.
i miss it.
but i mustn't,
I must get detached.
I can't get sent away again,
I can't be alone again.
But part of me,
Part of me wants to get sent away.
Part of me wants to be alone for a while,
Part of my says it would be better.
But part of me,
Part of me says you'll hurt to many people,
Part of my says it will just give you more urge,
Part of me says ill get put there and not let out.
I'm fighting my self,
Mentally and physically.
All of me wants to stop.
But,i just cant get along with my self.