Dearly Beloved, It Ends Here Tonight
I seek for you to allow yourself to be happy. You fail to do so. I understand you are hurting and fractured underneath, but you have yet to test my advice in which you so often seek. I believe you truly have not a clue of how much this troubles me, how much it pains me to see you, my dearly beloved, in such a miserable state, along with the feelings that I have failed to bring you happiness. I, as your closest friend, have apparently failed you, failed to show you the light of truth. Pathetic, I am quite aware, yet I cannot seem to bring forgiveness from myself for my failures of coming short of bringing you joy. Genuine, true, clearly etched upon your face, joy.
You are beckoning me in and I am falling victim to your misery. If you fall Love, I would not, for one short moment, dream of releasing your hand. For I would surely collapse as well. I, myself, cannot soundly sleep nor peacefully rest within myself until you have done so first. Then I may be free to echo and follow you back into the light in which I so often pray you have not forgotten.
Oh Darling, how I miss the twilight that was so common on your face, forming your face and taking mold to create such remarkable, breathtaking features, from your eyes that were once so desirable. How I long for them to fall upon mine, in the same way in which was once so customary. As if holding me in your view would stop the pain, stop the agony and suffering. Oh but that would be much too desirable, too unrealistic, a dream far beyond this consistent reality. I would surely bare witness of snow crystallizing the dust of the heated ground in the midst of July before you would come back and join me. To reassure me, to reunite us.
Although, in the depth of my being, I am fully aware that I must put more distance between us. I must build my defence in order to build back my happiness and break through this despair. Oh Darling, please do not dare think that I have chose to abandon you, I could never. I have chosen to free myself of my constant ache and restless mind of worrying. Please allow yourself to feel my pain through this letter, for I have been breaking myself for you. Know that I have always, and shall always love you. You truly are my addiction. I must not break you, but simply learn to heal my wounds and slowly detach myself from this deathly grip. It pains me sharply to say so, but I am sure, that this, this is best. Though Darling, I am, Yours, Always.
You are beckoning me in and I am falling victim to your misery. If you fall Love, I would not, for one short moment, dream of releasing your hand. For I would surely collapse as well. I, myself, cannot soundly sleep nor peacefully rest within myself until you have done so first. Then I may be free to echo and follow you back into the light in which I so often pray you have not forgotten.
Oh Darling, how I miss the twilight that was so common on your face, forming your face and taking mold to create such remarkable, breathtaking features, from your eyes that were once so desirable. How I long for them to fall upon mine, in the same way in which was once so customary. As if holding me in your view would stop the pain, stop the agony and suffering. Oh but that would be much too desirable, too unrealistic, a dream far beyond this consistent reality. I would surely bare witness of snow crystallizing the dust of the heated ground in the midst of July before you would come back and join me. To reassure me, to reunite us.
Although, in the depth of my being, I am fully aware that I must put more distance between us. I must build my defence in order to build back my happiness and break through this despair. Oh Darling, please do not dare think that I have chose to abandon you, I could never. I have chosen to free myself of my constant ache and restless mind of worrying. Please allow yourself to feel my pain through this letter, for I have been breaking myself for you. Know that I have always, and shall always love you. You truly are my addiction. I must not break you, but simply learn to heal my wounds and slowly detach myself from this deathly grip. It pains me sharply to say so, but I am sure, that this, this is best. Though Darling, I am, Yours, Always.
♠ ♠ ♠
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