Cut out my feelings

You want to know how I feel
So you ask me
And expect something real
Expect me to spill my guts out to you
I won’t do it
I refuse
Holding it in
Seems to work better in the end
You may not understand
How it feels to slice your own skin
Feels damn good
Own personal high
Better than weed or ecstasy
Doesn’t cost a thing
Just some blood
A little bit of lies
Sacrifice of self love
The feeling of wanting to die
Is
So
Comforting
At least it is to me
Helps me to know I’m still alive
Not in a never ending horrific dream
Where no one hears
My
Blood
Curdling
Screams
My self inflicted pain
Feels so good
I go into my own world
Where I’m finally understood
Do you understand?
How it feels to sink
In my world
Of blood red sand
No
No you don’t
Because if you did
You’d let me self inflict wounds
Cause you would know what it feels like
When you are sliced by the weight of the silver moon
You want to know how I feel
Look at my wrist
The cuts
The scars
They are real
This isn’t a dream
Life isn’t perfect
But shedding a little blood
Helps make living worth it