I want to be...

I want to be thin,
Cuz when I look in the mirror,
I want to die,
All I see is...
Me...
Fat....
Disgusting....
Scars...
Overweight...

I want to be beautiful,
Cuz when I look in the mirror,
I'm disgusted,
All I see is...
Me...
Ugly,
Dead eyes...
Emotionless lips...
A ghost of who I used to be...

I don't want to be fat,
I don't want to be ugly,
I don't want to be fake.

I don't want to feel hopeless,
I don't want to feel depressed,
I don't want to feel hated.

I don't want to have an enemy.
I don't want to have nothing,
I don't want to have my own funeral.

I want to be thin,
I want to be beautiful,
I want to be me.

I want to feel hope,
I want to feel happiness,
I want to feel love.

I want to have a lover,
I want to have a goal,
I want to have a life.