Confusion

Am I truly stupid?
Or are my fears necessary?

Silence from you
For so long

Torture from her
And her typed words

Pain aches in my chest
As I wait for my phone to ring

Sorrow clamps my throat
For hours of loneliness

Am I really just stupid?
Or am I readying for another hit?

Temptation from the blade
That helps rid the pain

Distrust grows deep
As I wonder about hidden lies

Uncertainty from the mind
For knowing your feelings for her

Tears from my eyes
When I question if your words are forced

Am I stupid?
Or am I close to the end...again?