Listen To Me

I sat here tonight

and held a blade to my wrist.

I wanted to feel alive,

to feel pain,

to bleed.

I sat here, blindly,

not seeing what

this world is doing to me.

I feel alone,

stuck inside a world

where I do not belong.

I'm stuck in this raging chaos,

scared to actually see

what is happening to me.

And no one cares,

I am alone.

I don't know what to do.

I'm scared of myself and the others around me.

I'm scared of getting hurt

but I enjoy pain because

then I know I am alive

and that my heart is beating

but pain is what drove

me here in the first place.

Am I all alone?

Why am I all alone?

Why do I have to face this myself?

Why does everyone ignore me?

I AM NOT HAPPY!!!

Happy is just a mask

I wear to hide my pain

in which I love so tenderly.

I'm sad!

Confused!

Lonely!

Depressed!

Suicidal!

Miserable!

Frightened!

Ugly!

But no one listens

to these words I shout

because of my godforsaken

mask of false illusions!

Listen to me!

Listen to me!

Listen to me!

Do you not hear me screaming?!

I need help!

Save me!

Save me!

Help me help myself!

I don't know what to do!

I'm going crazy!

This blade is tempting me!

These pills are calling my name!

This gun is staring at me!

This rope is tightning around my neck!

Whay has this world done to me?

I'm not happy!

Save me!