WHAT I WENT THROUGH
Take a gun called hate
Put it up to your heart and pull the trigger
It’s not over it’s not over until we say
Bleeding to death
Slowly running out of breath
Afraid
Scars are self-made
Watching the tears fall from her eyes
I never got to say my good-byes
Hoping this is just a nightmare
In my mind somewhere
Waiting for this life to end
So I can stop hurting people
My neck is extend on the noose
Can’t stop taking in the abuse
She is fearful
What might happen next?
Screaming for help
Everything is so perplexed
Screams dying down into nothing
Going numb
Nothing but darkness incases me
Everything has turned blurry
This is the time to attack this hate in my heart
And turn it to something good
My soul has depart
She was withstood
Curled up in a ball
Now its nightfall
All is in all
What is left?
This death
I’m bereft
Seeing her smile one last time
That could last a lifetime
Slowly but surely I smile back
Taking her hand
Keep thinking playback
Playback
Please I don’t want to go
Her tears are so hard to withstand
Feelings of hope inflow
She whispers I love you
I slowly stand come to find out it was all a fucked up dream
I say holding her hand I love you too
She is asked “what’s wrong?”
Nightmare
All nightlong
This is so much better
I turn my head and I see the razor
Who could guess that something so small could do that much damage?
All the wreckage
I grab it and walk off
Looking at all the bloodstains all over it, the scars it has marked on me
That I can’t hide
I put the razor inside
…. The trashcan
I’m a free woman
Not letting this bring me down
Drowning in happiness
She walks up behind me and tells me everything will be different now
I turn around and smile I know because of you
She came closer and said “have I told you I-“
I finish what I knew she was going to say… I love you too
We walked off forgetting all the hurt and pain
It was just a game
Happiness is lasting a lifetime and I can’t just throw it away
I’m trying to gainsay
The hate the thoughts
Everything is perfect
I am trying to be a better person
Overwhelmed by feelings
I feel happy but lost
My feelings are strangling
It’s like my feelings are embossed
Asking for help is something I despise
It makes me feel like I’m weak
I look out the window at the moonrise
I can’t say I give up
I throw a blanket around me trying to warm-up
Caught in this mess
Looking for success
Everything is going fast
I can’t stop this
I hate but love at the same time
I keep being harassed
By my feelings
It’s like my feelings are gimcrack
Finally it attacks
The happiness, the hope… everything
Fades and I keep screaming I want to feel better
Everything I feel just decays
I don’t know what happened
Put it up to your heart and pull the trigger
It’s not over it’s not over until we say
Bleeding to death
Slowly running out of breath
Afraid
Scars are self-made
Watching the tears fall from her eyes
I never got to say my good-byes
Hoping this is just a nightmare
In my mind somewhere
Waiting for this life to end
So I can stop hurting people
My neck is extend on the noose
Can’t stop taking in the abuse
She is fearful
What might happen next?
Screaming for help
Everything is so perplexed
Screams dying down into nothing
Going numb
Nothing but darkness incases me
Everything has turned blurry
This is the time to attack this hate in my heart
And turn it to something good
My soul has depart
She was withstood
Curled up in a ball
Now its nightfall
All is in all
What is left?
This death
I’m bereft
Seeing her smile one last time
That could last a lifetime
Slowly but surely I smile back
Taking her hand
Keep thinking playback
Playback
Please I don’t want to go
Her tears are so hard to withstand
Feelings of hope inflow
She whispers I love you
I slowly stand come to find out it was all a fucked up dream
I say holding her hand I love you too
She is asked “what’s wrong?”
Nightmare
All nightlong
This is so much better
I turn my head and I see the razor
Who could guess that something so small could do that much damage?
All the wreckage
I grab it and walk off
Looking at all the bloodstains all over it, the scars it has marked on me
That I can’t hide
I put the razor inside
…. The trashcan
I’m a free woman
Not letting this bring me down
Drowning in happiness
She walks up behind me and tells me everything will be different now
I turn around and smile I know because of you
She came closer and said “have I told you I-“
I finish what I knew she was going to say… I love you too
We walked off forgetting all the hurt and pain
It was just a game
Happiness is lasting a lifetime and I can’t just throw it away
I’m trying to gainsay
The hate the thoughts
Everything is perfect
I am trying to be a better person
Overwhelmed by feelings
I feel happy but lost
My feelings are strangling
It’s like my feelings are embossed
Asking for help is something I despise
It makes me feel like I’m weak
I look out the window at the moonrise
I can’t say I give up
I throw a blanket around me trying to warm-up
Caught in this mess
Looking for success
Everything is going fast
I can’t stop this
I hate but love at the same time
I keep being harassed
By my feelings
It’s like my feelings are gimcrack
Finally it attacks
The happiness, the hope… everything
Fades and I keep screaming I want to feel better
Everything I feel just decays
I don’t know what happened