Situations

I don't know how much longer I can deal
It's weighting me down
What it is I don't know
I can't deal with all the stress much longer
I have to find something to do about it
I have trued crying, makes it worse
I've tried ignoring it, pain to intense to ignore
I say I'm able to do all these things
In reality
I'm not
Never was
Never will
That's how it is
It will never change
People think it will
They don't know the reality of the situation
They don't know what goes on
I don't either
I should but
I don't
Thats how sad of a person I am
Sometimes I just want to die but I know if I do I will hurt people, more than I hurt
I will leave great people that I don't deserve
I don't want to do that
No matter what I love all the people in my life
Even the annoying ones
So I have to learn to buck up and deal
It's not easy but I've learned
I'll get over it eventually
But I don't know how long until this i s all done