Welcome Back Relapse, My Name Is Cutter. Nice To See You Again.

Welcome back relapse.
Smiles with eyes wide.
I’m surely insane.
I don’t know who I am.
I know what I do.
What I did is who I am I suppose.
Cutting is part of my past present and future.
No escaping this deadly disease.
I feel so happy cutting.
And with that I know I'm gone.
I know I shouldn’t be happy.
They tell me time after time.
“baby promise me you won’t cut anymore, please just promise”
Promise I did.
I did stop for a while.
I hate who i've become.
To rewrite history would a great gift.
But alas I know I must visit this old friend of mine.
You see he goes by the name of self hate.
He lives within, stacked behind all the fake smiles and laughter.
With every stack, the more you pile on the bigger the aftermath of the fall.
Fall I did.
Great destruction I see.
Tearing open my skin.
Cut after cut.
My wrist on longer resembling what it once was.
The sight, such a scene.
Smiling down on the mangled mess.
The first real smile in a while.
I'm still sad because I know that if I were to be seen,
I would be seen as insane.
But then again I already know I am.
I can control this.
I can’t control how much I cut.
I want to be in control of at least one thing in my life again.
The eerie silence of my mind.
I feel I can’t escape.
These thought of cut again no one will care.
Secretly I wish you can see my pain and help me escape.
Let me out of here.
I’m so lonely.
The waves crashing on my chest.
So heavy I can’t feel the world anymore.
And at that point in life,
She found her greatest peace.