Feelings of now and Then

Old feelings I try to fight,
Come out and play in the night.
Depression and sadness come realing in,
All the feelings from now and then.
My tears fall and that's all they do,
Seeming they don't matter to you.
So many of my words I can not find,
Once upon a long time I shined.
Just give up and not even care,
My feelings are not yours to share.
I'll let the phone die in my pocket,
And you go on not worring about it.
Making choices that only please you,
Me sitting here saying 'I need to be happy too'.
Go ahead and live your life,
I'll sit here and get lost in time.
Sadness will rip at my seems,
That I've locked up and thrown away the keys.
Depression will sit in my mind,
You'll sit there and think I'm not that kind.
I'll get help with out your knowing,
Because everyone can see it showing.