missed

so here i stand
a knife in hand
skin ready to be slit
no where else but the vein in my wrist
as the knife glides down
i look around
and found i am missed
i see my little sisters tears run down their brown spoted cheeks,
where the angels have kissed
my parents cried
im surprised they care.
my sisters are down,
my brothers are mad
to see them like this
i cannot bare.
their home falls silent
but not my home
ive never fit in
i didnt belonged there,
i never have
and never will
not any more.
so here i stand
at my grave
i see dying flowers all around
i see letters scattered on my ground
i hear no laughs,
i see no smiled faces of loved ones
i only hear cries of my name
i only see tear streaked faces of loved ones
nothing else.
its sad to say
but now i wish
to take it back
to save my life
to put it back on track
but now its to late,
my life is finished
my life has only come to an end.
and now i think
how they used to say they cared
and i thought why they would say such thing to me for?
but now i know
they truly cared
i miss the words
they cant say anymore.