Control

I've come so close
too many times
to just giving up
and saying
FUCK IT ALL
but you know I've
realized that I can
just sit there and
not care, and there's
no effort involved and
you know it's way
easier than they say
because it makes you
look like the worst person
ever, but everyone leaves
you alone, and it's
amazing, it rocks, and so
I tried this and I realized
I can care, but not for the
people who don't have
time for me in their lives
I'm no one's backup plan
I'm my own person
if you don't want me in your
life just say so, because
you're wasting my time
lying to me. tell me now
do you want me in your
life or am I just another block
in your puzzle? I realize now
that I'm not that important
to most, but the people that
matter are the ones that care
and I thank them for that. I don't
need anyone who doesn't need
me and that means I can care,
but also not give a fuck at the same
time, and it's an amazing feeling,
the moment of truth, it's so eye
opening, it makes you want to jump
for joy and squeal because you've
realized that you are a whole
new person that you can care
about what you want and that you
are finally in control.
Finally.