untitled

notice me notice me
i can’t stand you but you’re lovely even though i know you don’t see me, only in the dark.
clipping my finger nails getting horny
i can’t stand you anymore but i like the way my hands get veiny when it’s hot and then
the sun blisters my skin
and my face is red
partially from blushing but also because i laid in the sand too long.
and i might send you love letters and leave them under your bed but i don’t think you would find them
but maybe just them being there
would trigger, idunno,
something.
so i’ll continue to stare at you
or the sun
whichever one
and i’ll try my best to not want to fuck myself.