Empty

I just want to feel something positive again
Something besides anger, sadness, and pain
I want to feel hope, or happiness
But everything around me is moving so fast
I can't keep up
I want to believe I could fix it if i fell in love
But who would ever want to love me?
The last boy who did shattered me, and left me for dead
I never want to feel that broken again
But late at night, when I'm all alone
I do
This time last year, I was happy
I thought the summer would just bring that happiness back
Instead I am just sinking deeper and deeper into this depression, this numbness
This darkness
I want to cut, to bleed, to scream
Because I don't know how else to express these feelings
Sell your soul to the pain
So you don't have to feel anything
Strike a deal with the devil
Because you hurt enough to sink to that level