Battle Within Yourself

In my head,
She throws me around the room.
The room is dark, but I can still see her.
"Become stronger.
Don't even step down to challenges.
Stop being such a fucking pussy!"
My head spins as she beats me down.
I stand, but she pushes me down.
She gives me the gun,
and tells me to shoot the people that hurt me.
"I surely cannot. I do not hurt innocent people."
She slaps me and pulls me by the scruff of my neck.
Then she slams me into the wall again.
"Yes you fucking well can!
They never respect you.
At least you can respect their bodies."
I lie there, while she is gone.
Please God.
Take this person away from my concious.
Before I have to use the gun on myself.
She is gone for a whole day.
I am relieved.
Out of my mind, he takes me to church.
I learn about God.
In my head, I hear these words:
"Come to Me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
I rise.
I raise my hands to the heavens.
I yelled out His name.
I felt weak.
Then, warm arms wrap around me.
"I will accept you for who you are and who you become."
I smile, knowing someone loved me.
She never came back.
Now, the room is filled with light.
My heart is healed.
I raise my arms,
and say
11:28.