Every day is a lie

I sit there smiling laughing
I die all day every day
I smile and say I’m fine for you
I do this so I won’t hurt you

I lie in bed and listen to music
I cry at night when I’m alone
I pick it up
I pick up the knife

I see the red line of blood appear
I see it on my arm
I cry more, as I see other scars
I wonder what I have done

I sit there smiling laughing
I lie in hope I can believe this
I know that I can’t
I know that every day is a lie