God Hates Me

Walking down the street
Feeling the cold breeze on my face
The rustle of leaves echoing in my ears
A thought crosses my mind
I wonder when I'll be okay
When everything around me
Will for once work out
Just wanting to see you
And hear your voice
Is all I ask for
Every night I pray
Or wish on every lucky star
That you'll be brought to me
That you'll be there forever and always
But forever seems to be drifting away
With the wind that blows through my hair
A sigh of pain exits my mouth
Tears begin to fall
Not knowing what to do
Or even what to say
I wonder why my life is so bad
Why it's filled with sorrow,
Hate, and confusion
No point in living
No point in waking up every morning
I can't see what I've done
To deserve all of this pain
As I lay my head down to rest
I stare at the four dark walls
Of a room that isn't even considered mine
I don't really understand what's happening
Why I can't even tell the ones I trust
They would never understand
Even if they read what I've written
In the binder of my pain and misery
My mind drifts off into space
Imagining things that I wish would happen
Seeing you, smiling, laughing
And maybe even playing an electric guitar
Things I've been wanting for a while
Wishing that this day dream
Would be my reality
I hate the fact that I can't find you
My one and only
I sit and say, "Oh I'll find you one day, some day"
But what if I don't have a one day?
What if I don't have a some day?
Finally falling asleep
I begin to feel calm
For being asleep is the only time
Where there is no worries
No pain
Only dreams
Dreams that I sometimes wish would come true
The dreams of me and you
The dreams of being on top of the world
The dreams of actually feeling alright
Waking up, a new day begins
And the pain returns
It's hard to get over something
That haunts my mind
If only God would hear me
If only he didn't turn his back
But it's my life story
Only one page long
Only one sentance
Only three small words:

"God Hates Me."

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