Scary Dream
Haunted by nightmares
Scary places in my head
I see you lying there almost dead
I stay up all night with no meals
Days and days I wait for your arrival
You're laying there lifeless but not dead
Injured but peaceful; asleep.
This is the first time I've seen you in awhile
I've been selfish
I've been self-centered
You left and I thought you were gone.
Forever.
I found someone.
He stayed in the hospital with me.
He was my everything.
My love.
My dream.
I can't remember his name.
He tried to get me to eat and sleep but I denied.
I wouldn't until you awoke.
Stuck in a coma, I never gave up hope.
I prayed for you to wake up.
I prayed to see your beautiful eyes again.
I prayed to hug you and never let go.
I prayed to never leave again.
I cried for the days.
I didn't sleep.
I didn't eat.
I cried on his shoulder as he held me.
You had bruises all over your body, and a head concussion.
I was scared that you would wake up and not remember anything.
That you wouldn't remember me.
The earth-shattering fear, I set aside.
It wasn't fair.
You were always a careful driver.
It wasn't your fault.
They hit you dead on.
I still felt bad for the way we were.
How everything was between us.
By your bed, I held your hand.
I never let go.
I didn't want to.
I didn't have the need to.
This was about you.
Not me.
Not my selfish ways.
A nurse would come and check your vials everyday.
She had a reassuring smile on her face.
She had a hope for you to wake up as well.
She told us you would.
But time would tell.
The days dragged on.
They felt like years.
But I still had hope.
One day, I felt your hand move.
I cried more than I ever have.
He asked what was it and you moved once again.
Your beautiful eyes opened up.
The first time I've seen them in awhile.
You were happy that I was there.
Ecstatic even.
Your smile so white and big.
Bright.
Invited.
Happy.
I thought you would of wanted me gone.
I haven't talked or seen you in so long.
I thought you would of hated me.
We hugged.
For the longest time.
He offered to get me food.
For the first time in a week I said yes.
While he was gone me and you talked.
I fell asleep.
He came back chuckling.
He told you how I haven't ate or slept.
How I refused until you could.
He tried to get me to.
But I'm stubborn.
With that, he gave you the food instead.
I awoke the next morning.
Still in your arms.
You smiled the brightest I've seen ever.
I just cried more.
I couldn't see how you could forgive me.
But you did.
You were still my brother.
My best friend.
You wouldn't let go.
You still loved me.
You still wanted me around.
You liked him.
You thought he was good for me.
That he was my "Mr. Right"
I ate for the first time in a week.
You were soon released.
You recovered fast.
You graduated after your years in college.
I was so proud.
You stayed closer to home after college.
We still kept our ties.
Me and him were the happiest we could be.
It was even better with you still my best friend.
You two were my everything.
I awoke from my nightmare.
It was so real.
But myself was the nightmare.
And the fear of losing you.
The way after you left high school.
The way we didn't talk and lost all connections.
But I'd rather have our friendship, then over "him" anyday.
I never want something like this to happen.
My biggest fear came alive in my nightmare.
It was also a lesson though.
That no matter what, we still need to keep ties.
I don't want to lose a connection and then see you when you're hurt.
I've been thinking all day about this.
About how can I handle you graduating.
How I'll make it through my senior year.
I'm more scared than anything.
But I think it'll be good for our friendship.
Make us stronger than we are.
All I know is that I never want to lose you.
And that I love you.
Nothing will change either of those things.
Nothing will.
Scary places in my head
I see you lying there almost dead
I stay up all night with no meals
Days and days I wait for your arrival
You're laying there lifeless but not dead
Injured but peaceful; asleep.
This is the first time I've seen you in awhile
I've been selfish
I've been self-centered
You left and I thought you were gone.
Forever.
I found someone.
He stayed in the hospital with me.
He was my everything.
My love.
My dream.
I can't remember his name.
He tried to get me to eat and sleep but I denied.
I wouldn't until you awoke.
Stuck in a coma, I never gave up hope.
I prayed for you to wake up.
I prayed to see your beautiful eyes again.
I prayed to hug you and never let go.
I prayed to never leave again.
I cried for the days.
I didn't sleep.
I didn't eat.
I cried on his shoulder as he held me.
You had bruises all over your body, and a head concussion.
I was scared that you would wake up and not remember anything.
That you wouldn't remember me.
The earth-shattering fear, I set aside.
It wasn't fair.
You were always a careful driver.
It wasn't your fault.
They hit you dead on.
I still felt bad for the way we were.
How everything was between us.
By your bed, I held your hand.
I never let go.
I didn't want to.
I didn't have the need to.
This was about you.
Not me.
Not my selfish ways.
A nurse would come and check your vials everyday.
She had a reassuring smile on her face.
She had a hope for you to wake up as well.
She told us you would.
But time would tell.
The days dragged on.
They felt like years.
But I still had hope.
One day, I felt your hand move.
I cried more than I ever have.
He asked what was it and you moved once again.
Your beautiful eyes opened up.
The first time I've seen them in awhile.
You were happy that I was there.
Ecstatic even.
Your smile so white and big.
Bright.
Invited.
Happy.
I thought you would of wanted me gone.
I haven't talked or seen you in so long.
I thought you would of hated me.
We hugged.
For the longest time.
He offered to get me food.
For the first time in a week I said yes.
While he was gone me and you talked.
I fell asleep.
He came back chuckling.
He told you how I haven't ate or slept.
How I refused until you could.
He tried to get me to.
But I'm stubborn.
With that, he gave you the food instead.
I awoke the next morning.
Still in your arms.
You smiled the brightest I've seen ever.
I just cried more.
I couldn't see how you could forgive me.
But you did.
You were still my brother.
My best friend.
You wouldn't let go.
You still loved me.
You still wanted me around.
You liked him.
You thought he was good for me.
That he was my "Mr. Right"
I ate for the first time in a week.
You were soon released.
You recovered fast.
You graduated after your years in college.
I was so proud.
You stayed closer to home after college.
We still kept our ties.
Me and him were the happiest we could be.
It was even better with you still my best friend.
You two were my everything.
I awoke from my nightmare.
It was so real.
But myself was the nightmare.
And the fear of losing you.
The way after you left high school.
The way we didn't talk and lost all connections.
But I'd rather have our friendship, then over "him" anyday.
I never want something like this to happen.
My biggest fear came alive in my nightmare.
It was also a lesson though.
That no matter what, we still need to keep ties.
I don't want to lose a connection and then see you when you're hurt.
I've been thinking all day about this.
About how can I handle you graduating.
How I'll make it through my senior year.
I'm more scared than anything.
But I think it'll be good for our friendship.
Make us stronger than we are.
All I know is that I never want to lose you.
And that I love you.
Nothing will change either of those things.
Nothing will.