finalizing my nightmare

i made the call today.
the one to finalize my nightmare.
i heard his voice and
i still got butterflies.

i knew it was over,
his voice showed only
slight remorse
he threw away my journal,
his watch?

my hands they shake
i feel even more deflated
yet relived i think
i'm just unsure
of everything.

DId he love me?
does he still?
i know i love him
i'm scared without him

i've lost my best friend
i've lost my hope
i've lost my best friend
and all i can do
is cry and be sorry