September

It will sound awful to you, but you see, the truth is that halfway through I began to feel that this was unceasingly insipid, dumb. And it was not your fault; it was only me, in realizing that this was what I was, as a human, supposed to enjoy, yet I did not. I did not dislike it, but I did not like it either. I felt guilty, but then I figured I shouldn’t because I’m allowed to feel however the fuck I want. I know you are eager, and I will not push you away but I cannot say that we are on the same path, so to speak. Maybe I just need more time but that doesn’t seem right either. I am not afraid or nervous or anxious or unwanting, simply: bored.

And I really am sorry about that.