I'm Struggling

It's not really betrayal on my soul
I knew this day would rise.
I'd see that you belonged to her
I'd be no longer blind.

I'd hide the fact from myself
Repeating the doubts and lies.
So I could live in comfort ,contrition
So I could cover my eyes.

I always put my trust in you
I was sure you'd save me from this life.
Now although I hate myself to say it
I'm sure you bring the strife.

Stop me if you've heard this before
It was never you, it was me.
I was just so happy being ignorant
I guess I didn't want to see.

Don't try and say it's for the best
You're happy when I'm not.
Remember when I called you my angel?
Obviously you forgot.

I'm struggling to speak the words
Respond the way you want me too.
Because although I love your very presence
I've lost some trust in you.

You once had my heart and broke it
No matter how real or wrong.
Though I hate it, I still feel for you
You've known that all along.