Neon Black

You wouldn’t think that men have it worse than us
What with us being women and all
We all have body issues
People think women are the worst
But men have to have a six-pack, clear eyes, and muscled arms
To be handsome and attractive
At least that’s what they think
They’re insecure about their teeth
That’s why they chew gum constantly
It also helps with bad breath
Which they believe they always have
They have to hold a steady job
And get married before they’re thirty
They need at least two kids
And they have to save for their college funds
They need to provide a house with a yard
A car that won’t break down
They have to make sure there’s food to be found
And electricity, hydro, and heating
They’re not allowed to show emotion
Unless sports teams are involved
And if they feel like wearing neon
They’ll bury it deep, wear something black
They can’t get piercings, exception: punk rock
No tattoos if they aren’t Hells Angels
They’re forced into this tiny box
And ladies, we built the box
They’re afraid to get intimate
Because they fear we’ll laugh
At the size of his package
The strength of his love
Or his inexperience
When they get angry, it’s not one little thing
It’s everything upon their shoulders
Dragging them down, breaking their backs
Until finally, they crack, crack, crack
They worry about their hair
And going prematurely bald
They worry about fake tans
Chest hair
And how many calories they ate last night
They fret about bulking and cutting
Trying to get ripped
They have so much shit to deal with
Plus their nagging, whining, bitchy women
Oh wait; those would be us
We never let up on them, never cut them some slack
We’re taught to just expect it from them
That it has to be this way
But the least we can do
A small start, if you will
Is to acknowledge their everyday battles
Their worries and fears and expectations
Because if any of us had to be one of them for the day
The world would roll down our backs,
Snap our spines,
And shatter on their marble floors