For the First Time in a Long Time

I thought about you for the first time
In a long time,
You were just there in my mind
Smiling like you always did
Making me feel like I was on top of the world.
Then I remembered that night
You told me I wasn’t worth you time
That you didn’t want to ruin our friendship
My heart sank at the sound of those words in my head.
I thought about you for the first time in a long time
And my heart just sank down
I needed you to stand by me and hold me
But you just didn’t see what you want in me
I guess
I woke up this morning with a text from you just saying “hey”
And I thought of you again, and the way used to stay up all night
Just talking, talking about nothing
I thought about you for the first time in a long time
You twirl around my mind like all those times we ran in the park
When I lay in the grass, you’re there in my mind looking at the stars with me
I started to cry cause you weren’t there
But those tears were in vain cause you never were.
I thought about you for the first time in a long time
But I just left the thought of you on my pillow with the tears
I thought I could handle it but I couldn’t
So I walked away.