Ambitions and fears

I know my ambitions im not blind
so why do I have ppl sayin whats mine
they act like im not even tryin
all this pressure buildin up in my mind n
its pushin me to the limits makin me short on time n
the only.release is writin these rhymes
wish I could go.back n right my crimes
undo some things I did.react on things better then when I was a kid,
prove myself as a man
learn to let shit go, try n make a stand,
instead of wantin to blow my brains out let things get clear and try n find a way out,
try n lose my doubt, lose my fear, learn to take control be the one to.steer,
get outta this slump im stuck in here. I lost my mind several cells at a time jus sayin that im not here wish I was further gone, or that I was fully myself,
cant be either so I needa disappear,
I know my ambitions, set in stone they are clear. all too many ambitions and fears