i just wish i could grieve for you

“I just wish I could grieve for you”
The glow has completely faded from my eyes
I’ve lost every sense of self
I no longer fins hope in your smile
Wondering around like I don’t belong
There has to be a different path that doesn’t involve
Me looking into the cold mirror
And not knowing who the blank confused girl
Is staring back through my eyes
Once again I’m numb to everything I want to feel
No matter how much it should hurt, not a tear falls
My heart has iced over, my smile painted on
The emotion and depth have faded from my body
I’m scared to face the truth
That I’ve lost myself everything that ever mattered
Is just blowing away in the wind
And all I can do is stare
But it doesn’t burn like it used to
The feeling that nothing will ever be right again
Just doesn’t seem to mean as much as it did
So I’ll stand here with my feet planted to the ground
With my forgotten eyes and painted smile
My iced heart and wondering mind
I’ll stand here and watch you leave
Trying to figure what exactly you meant when you said
“I love you”