Loving Him is Killing Me Inside

I realize it's a zombie Apocalypse,
And that loving him will only lead to disaster,
But my feelings pursue,
Like demons, they haunt my soul,
Hungering, whining after him.
My heart skips a little bit faster in his presence,
And I know my emotions are out of control,
Spiraling in an endless tornado,
With no sign of stopping.
There's just something about him that makes me happy though,
And isn't that the only thing matters?
If I'm happy?
I know that isn't right, because you can't just go on whims and
Expect everything to work out.
Life isn't supposed to be that way.
As I bring a gun to a zombie's head I try to wash away my feelings with blood,
And violence.
It'll never work though, because once I look into his eyes I will fall in love again,
And the whole vicious cycle will begin once more.
It's like my destiny to be constantly suffering,
I feel as if I were dead, a limb severed off,
And my heart ripped out of my chest, left beating there,
Bleeding and oozing out my pain.
I know it's foolish to love in a world full of torment but I can't help it.
It's a dog eat dog eat world,
And I am aware of the cruel reality.
I just wish I weren't so young and foolish,
Because I know this will be the death of me