A Heart's Last Lament

What in God's name have you done to me?
Or maybe what did I do to myself?
You're all that's ever on my mind,
Even after putting my feeling on a shelf.

You've got your grip around my neck,
Being choked by the hand I used to hold.
Though now my fingers know no touch,
And my blood has run cold.

Though I can't get you out of my system,
You're like a ghost through the day.
But when the sun sets and eyes ablaze,
You give me my own personal hell to pay.

Your face is all is I see when closed eyes,
Your voice is all that I can manage to hear.
Even in the dead silence of a sleeping world,
You're by me always near.

I don't understand what chains you have on me,
What voodoo you must possess.
These cuffs and shackles are heavy to carry,
God I must confess.

You were once my light of day,
The brightest star that illuminated my sky.
Turned nearly evil to the rock over the fire,
To every stream of tear do my eyes cry.

When times of past, what held me was a string,
A sort of such easy to break.
Now illuminated to show the chains you hold,
Under the weight I shake.

Let me be free, I plead.
The rope is digging into my wrist.
Out drains the blood, you're killing me,
Let go of this twist.

Urgent is now my voice,
Fear grows above anger and pain.
Alone and crying have become my nights,
Each one sickeningly the same.

I'm crying to be unleashed,
I'm not as strong as I started to be.
Not your fault but very much my own,
Letting a heart get the best of me.

I'm sorry I dragged you to this place,
Forgive my imperative bickering of so,
Only please do I now
Beg of God in heaven to let me go.

My rope is stained of blood,
Be it in my very own.
Tricky bastard of a heart to kill yourself,
Dripping down my arm is blood shown.

I see now that you're just there as bait,
You were the one to put me in.
Don't you now see me to my knees,
Begging of you to condole my sin.

Cut my ropes of blood,
To my chains I know you somewhere hold the key.
Under starlit skies I see you are,
You stare and let me be.

Your face is quiet with nothing to give,
No words, no room for talk.
Though your eyes look at me and pierce,
You're not the one to unlock.

It's what I've so feared all along,
Nor you or God himself could ever assist,
Freeing myself was never in my stars.
The flying comet I missed.

Don't leave me to be here,
Bloodied wrists as you walk away.
Though there you do walk away from me again,
Nothing left to say.

You think I'm pathetic,
Though I couldn't agree more.
Perhaps I'm even more hopeless
Than the girl you loved before.

I'm no locksmith.
My teeth are not as sharp a blade.
Though as I lay here dying and chained,
I can feel from your heart I've gone to fade.

Though my heart still intertwined with your beat
Does it so pulse.
In your presence, to your sight,
Do my lungs begin to convulse.

Though my heart you still make race,
I've finally got your message loud and clear.
I'll just wander with a shackle,
Still living in that fear.

Don't worry about me,
I'm sure I won't even cross your mind.
I'll just search with bloodied wrists and tied hands
The remains of a heart to find.

I'll be a good girl from now on,
I should obey what life wants me to.
I'm sorry I ever fucked up your life,
But that's all I know how to do.