Help me ?

How do I explain it? What do I do ?
How do I fix this ? Is there any hope?
I have this feeling deep inside that I always seem to hide
They have no clue, none at all.
I wish things were different that's all.
I feel so alone, yet I have so many people that's there for me.
All I want is to be happy, I never felt it before.
All there is sadness nothing more.
My heart is beating but it is filled with emptiness.
There is a smile, that hides my pain.
Words to hide my tears.
I can't take it anymore, it is to much to handle.
There is so much one can take, I think I reached my point.
So many thoughts running through my mind, things swore I would hide.
But it is slowly slipping out.
I need some hope, I need something to change this all .
Im sitting there begging wont you help me at all ?