Haunted

I am optimistic around them
I cry alone
I smile to everyday
I don't know what reality is
I admire someone i'll never have
Secretly, I want them to know me
Do I know myself?
I am manic, I am schizophrenic
The voices talk and I listen
I talk no one listens
My hope is thin
the life line on my palm is short
My lungs fill with smoke and I keep it in
Have I wasted away?
Why do I think of you every waking second?
Why do I love you? Why do I hate you?
Why am I jealous of people that talk to you?
I have cut myself and saw nothing but blood and felt nothing but guilt
My throat still burns.
They hand me a straw and tell me to breath as they watch over the doc.
Poisoned life...