Sick and Tired

I'm over it.
I'm over the bullshit.
I'm sick of feeling this way.
And I'm sick of myself.
Yeah I'm not that bad off,
But fuck, to me, what I'm feeling, is shit.
I hate it.
I hate feeling like things can and will only get worse.
Like everyone is getting what I want,
What I had.
Things were perfect,
Then life turned to shit.
Why? I don't even know.
Yeah things will get better.
But right now, I hate it.
I want things back to normal.
I'm sick of feeling like shit..
I'm tired of wishing things were different, better.
Why did it all just crash?
Why did my life turn upside down?
Why me?
But not only me, everyone.
I don't know what to do anymore,
What to think,
How to act.
It's like being in a completely new place, everything is different and scary.
Except I don't like this new place.
I always wonder why.
Why me?
Like why did he choose me?
Why did they choose me?
But why did he leave me?
Why does this happen to me?
Lines like that.
There's nothing special about me.
I'm fairly average really.
Not that pretty.
Not that skinny.
Not that smart.
Not this, not that.
Not what is wanted obviously.
I'm me though..