As I...

As I lie here, I think often about you
As I lie here, I hug the big stuffed bear you won for me at the fair
As I lie here, A tear slides down my cheek
As I lie here, I think about how we used to be
As I lie here, I know that I cannot love another
As I lie here, I pull out a razor blade

I sit up on my bed

As I sit here, I put the blade near my skin ready to draw blood
As I sit here, I think about you, and how bad you made me feel
As I sit here, I think about what I did wrong
As I sit here, I realize I did nothing but love you, therefore I did nothing wrong
As I sit here, I put away the razor blade
As I sit here, I pick up the bear

I stand up and head out the door

As I continue walking, I walk out of my room
As I continue walking, I walk past the books that I once enjoyed reading
As I continue walking, I head outside your bear in my ever stiffening grip
As I continue walking, I walk towards the end of the driveway my knuckles pure white
As I continue walking, The trash cans at the end of the driveway curb my interest

I open the lid to the big green Trash Can

As I stand there, I throw your bear in the trash, where you had once put my heart
As I stand there, I smile the first smile I've had in a long time
As I stand there, I will learn to love again