You are a gift that is mistaken as a curse.

Every waking hour 
I am thinking of you
Even in my sleep
I am dreaming about you 
I have written more poems and stories
About you than what I can count to
I have had more dreams about you
Than I have cells in my body
I have been in love with you
Longer than my sophomore year
I am loving you right now
Even though you are far away
I can't stop thinking of you
Even though I know I may never see you again
I love you even more
More than I love my family
Please dear lord god 
Let me stop loving you
Let me sleep at night
Without dreaming of you
Let me walk this earth
Not thinking of you
Let me write a poem or story
Without having you in it
Let me love someone else
Instead of always loving you
Let me move on with my life
I know I can never have you
I will never see you again
We have parted our ways
You
Are
Gone
But in my mind
I can see you clear as day
I can picture your face in a heart beat 
I can remember your voice and laugh just as fast
I can barely do that with my grandmother
Who has past 2 years ago
Why can't I let go of you?
Why won't my brain, my heart let me move on?
Why does god want to torture me like this?
Why do I deserve this?
Because of that fateful day
I laid eyes on you
That one time I heard your voice
That one time I heard you laugh
That is what caused my glorious misery
That is why I cannot let go of you. 
Sometimes I wish I had never met you
I had never seen your beautiful face,
With your gorgeous eyes. 
I wish I had never heard your angelic voice,
Your sweet boisterous laugh. 
Then I think, 
If I hadn't met you
I wouldn't have been the same as I am now
I would not know what love feels like. 
I wouldn't have had the spark that started me to write
I would not be who I am right now if I had not met you. 
You, beautiful, amazing, and talented girl,
Are a gift that can be mistaken as a curse.