I Miss Her

I miss the magic,
The butterflies,
The invincibility,
Knowing I have someone to talk to,

I miss the reliability,
And how you can stare into her eyes,
And think to yourself,
I am the luckiest man who ever lived,

To kiss her, eyes closed,
And for a second,
Float and wander,
Release from your body,

I miss holding her hand,
Or putting my arm around her waist,
Making everlasting promises,
Improving each others lives,

I miss touching her face,
And telling each other,
"Let's never leave this bed",
Just lay and rot there together,

I miss the exciting meetings,
Where'd we'd run together,
And give a magical hug and kiss,
And our smiles would illuminate the world,

I miss the sad departures,
Holding hands,
A slow, steady kiss goodbye,
Skipping home awaiting the next time,

If I could have it all back,
I'd give my life up,
I would walk across this earth,
I would slit my throat,

But I am just me,
An ugly wretch of a boy,
Unlovable, nervous, wreck,
I deserve nothing for my sins,
Which is why I'm tortured with my life to this day.