My Pain

This is me, the girl you see.
Fighting a pain, I'll never be free.
I try to hide my real feelings,
I feel that life has no more meaning.
I hide my face, and silence my voice,
being the real me was never a choice.
I do my job, and always pass,
But the pain in my soul kicks my ass.
It takes away the joy of life,
As if it came at me, swinging a knife.
You look as if you you'd seen a ghost,
When you look my way, I hurt the most.
I feel as if I don't belong,
I can't love again, you've done me wrong.
I bare the day, so when I leave,
I can be myself, I can be free.
I walk away lonely, knowing that soon,
I'll be to the place I wait for all afternoon.
I hide away quickly in the dark cemetary,
Where I try dark things, and my feelings are buried.
It's time I end this pain, so I sharpen my razor blade.
To slice along my scarred up wrist, yes that's the trick of the trade.
When all else fails, I find a rope, and tie it up real tight,
For I get ready so that I can, end my life tonight.
Hours pass, it's after midnight, and everyone's asleep.
I kick the stool from under my feet, nobody will miss me.
Within a few minutes, I stop fighting, and let my breath run free.
My body goes limp, and my eyelids close, as I think of you and me.
You said you cared, that I was yours, but that was only in private.
A whole other story roamed the streets, of what is known as the public.
I felt like a nothing, no one understood who I really was.
I believed I could've given mass amounts of love.
But that was then and this is now, my mind goes completely blank.
My pain is over, my spirit is free, and for that I give my thanks.
So next time you think your two cents is needed, where it doesn't belong.
Remember bitch, it is my life and it was all along.