Take A Deep Breath

Sometimes when the world feels like it's spinning too fast
And everything is a blur
Just close your eyes
Clench your fists

Take a deep breath in
And slowly release it
Your mind is preparing to see something
Something horrific

You feel your eyes opening but you aren't ready yet
Slowly
Your eyelids rise
And slowly, you see colors

You hear sounds again
There is no chatter in your head
There is no glare in your eyes
There is calm

You just executed it
It's gone, it's dead
And do you know what that was?
That was anger

Because you were so fucking tired of everything that you've been through
That they put you through
That you are STILL being put through
That everytime you lost yourself, it turned to anger

You were absolutely livid, and you didn't even realize it
While you were pressing that razor down to your leg
All your thoughts were pissed
And you couldn't wait to take your anger out on yourself

So step back from the crowd
And take an even deeper breath,
Because all these people are killing you
And you want to punch them all square in the face

So inhale
Exhale
And do it again
Unclench, and clench

And suffer throught the day without that razor,
Which is all you think about until you get home
And if you lose one, that's okay
You have a stash of pencil sharpeners and a screwdriver in your drawer

So scream into your pillow
Punch the wall
Smash some plates
Look at what you've done

Clean the mess,
And pretend again.

So take a deep breath
And exhale
And do it all over again.
Good luck tomorrow.