All That I Have.

Sipping tea to help me focus;
I am becoming caffeine dependent
to feel OK.

To keep me awake in the mornings
where I am particularly sleepy
and particularly sad.

It's not healthy,
but it's the best I have.

I don't dig the drugs,
the alcohol tastes bad,
so it's all that I have

but the words I make, the words I fucking read;
it all means nothing coming from me.

An account of each of my mental breakdowns,
I write and read out loud
the only time I feel OK;

The mug in my hand and the clicking sound of keys,
to be quite honest, I've come to know that's all that I have and all
that I really need.