A world away

I'm at the bottom of that rope
trying to start over
with every knot or kink I get knocked right back down to where I started
you'd never believe me if I said I was trying
but trust me when I say one day ill make it
stuck in this cycle isn't where I want to be
I want to be happy again
remember how things use to be
I remember the days when I never even thought id become this
when this was just a distant world
in my mind it never did exist
but then something happened
it all came crumbling down
now I sit in this room and think about what Ive done
I wish I could say how far Ive come
Its that feeling where something eats at you everyday
now only happiness is in that distant world away
and I can reach as much as I may
but will I ever reach that distant world away?