bloody paradise

Ive done it again. the promise i made broken.
its so easy though, so simple and enticing this task,
to help peal back and unravel pains lovely mask.
the cut isn't deep, the wound doesn't hurt.
i love to watch it flow, the lovely blood as it runs down my arm,
the rush as it drips drips drips into the dirt.
this razor is my one true friend, it helps me, it hurts me, it keeps me out of harm.
a feeling creeps in, under my joy, the guilt stopping my pleasure, forcing my paradise away.
i know what this pleasure will cost me, what it has already taken.
but the razor just shines as if happy, eager till next time to come out and play.
i i feel weak, scared, dizzy, broken and shaken.
i stumble along this empty road in my own bloody paradise,
a road lined with mirrors the faces i love looking back from them judging.
i feel ashamed, i feel hurt, their words unspoken paralyze,
i cant stand to look in their eyes, the hurt Ive caused with my pleasure,
but the blood keeps dripping until i feel nothing.
the light goes dim, i slip away, i know i will be gone for a time beyond measure,
but when i return, and i promise you this,
i will return bringing news of new bliss.